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brandon1584
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Name: Brandon
Country: United States
State: Texas
Metro: Denton
Birthday: 8/15/1984
Gender: Male
Interests: Church stuff. Movies. Music. Doing stuff with my friends. Lost, which is the greatest show in the history of television. Sports. Traveling (I havent done any really, but plan on it...).
Expertise: Dont really have one... I am usually pretty good at making people laugh... I think... Umm... But, I dont know that I am an expert at it...
Occupation: Other
Industry: Other
Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:  FirstJo44
Member Since:
3/27/2005
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| Well, I guess its time that I make an official announcement or something... I mean, I dont want for me to be held to this, but, I am probably 90% sure of what I am about to say. Before you jump to conclusions, hear me out.
I am not going to Oklahoma this fall. Not in the spring either. I'm going to wait until Graduate School. I still have every intention of doing ministry, and every intention of getting a masters in theology. But, I don't think that I need to go to OC right now. This isn't a decision that has come easy. It has come from a lot of late nights, tossing and turning not being able to sleep, a lot of conversations, and a lot of prayer. Why would you do this? one might ask. Well, lots of reasons. Where to begin...
This whole situation with whats going on at the CCC is leaving a bad taste in my mouth. Now then, I dont want to get into another big discussion about whats going on. I will just do this, long story short, this is just another event that is starting to make me realize that, there are way too much politics involved in church... Way to much image concerns. Way too much, what are people going to think. Too much, keep everyone happy, take care of ourselves. We get so hung up on stuff that, we neglect the ones that really need us, and contrary to popular belief, virtually none of those will ever step foot into a church. We become to concerned with progress, and activities, buildings and budgets, and in the mean time, completely neglect those around us that need us the most. WE get too concerned with mission statements and arguing whats right and wrong, and forget about the mission statement and the fact that, it doesn't matter whats right and wrong... you just have to love people no matter what, and hope that through you God shows them something... Right, so, long story short, I am starting to think that, this is the way that we our. This is what our modern church has become. And, I don't like it. And, I don't know how to change it. But, what I do know is, I don't think that being a youth minister is the way to go about it. If I were a youth minister, and I had to sit in meetings every week like most ministers do, if I had to deal with the politics, if I had to deal with the people pleasing, having to get everything approved, I would be burnt out by the time I was a year and a half out of school. I don't think that that is what it is about. And, like I said, I don't know how to change it. So, I am stuck. I don't know what to do now. I still have a very strong desire to do ministry. That is still something that I think I was put here for. But I don't know how. I don't know how I want to do that. I am not sure in what way I want to fulfill that purpose. So, with that said, I can not at all justify spending $20,000 a year on school, when I don't know what I am even doing there. I am not going to go and not take classes towards a degree that, i don't even think i need to do anymore. Also, I think that I can be of more use at UNT and NCTC than at OC. There are so many opportunities here right now. With all thats going on at the CCC, there are going to be tons of chances to get really involved, be vocal, and hopefully make a difference. I still have that excitement in me and that desire to go to OC, but, I don't think that right now is the time. I know that by me making this decision, I am going to probably get all kinds of comments from people about how, oh, this is just Brandon being Brandon. Always changing his mind, never following through. I dont care if thats what you think... I really dont care. Think that if you want. Its probably partly true, but, I honestly dont care if thats what you think. I was talking to a very dear friend last night and was going through about how I have always known what I was doing. I have always had a plan. I have always known where I was going, and when something fell through, I always knew where to go, what do do, and how to get back on track. When I flunked out of UNT, I knew how to get back on track by going to NCTC. When I failed there, I knew how to get back on track by going to OC. When I was going to AIM and decided not to, I knew a "better" way of accomplishing my goals. I have always known what I wanted to do, even though it has changed every six months for the last 6 years. Lets face it. I have never known. I had ideas, but, I never knew. I am starting to think that, I never really knew what I wanted. I felt a spark of excitement from each of those things, I saw a glimpse of how I could further the kingdom in each of those things. But, I didnt really want to do any of them... I mean, come on... Me as a Band Director? A... Pediatrician? A Physical therapist? No... But, I had reasons to think that they were cool, or a good idea. When in reality, it was just a break from the honest truth of... I have no idea what I am doing. And, this friend, she made a point to me that I hadnt thought of before. I am going to try to paraphrase, and, hopefully cover all that she said without adding stuff... "Maybe God is finally getting your attention. This whole time that you have known what you were doing, you never really involved him... It was always, this is what I am doing, and its right, without ever really taking the time to ask if it really was right. And, now you feel lost, and want answers, well, maybe thats because, this whole time you haven't even been asking the questions." I hope that was close enough, but, thats kind of what I got out of it. I think that she is right. Maybe this is it. Maybe God is finally getting my attention. Maybe this is him saying its time to get started. Maybe this is the beginning of my journey. Maybe this is God finally saying, come one, lets go, I have great things in store. Either way, I am in Denton. For at least another year or two. Then, who knows what. Hopefully OC. But, I really don't know. But, I think I am finally actually listening this time. Not just rushing into my own decisions. This has not been an easy decision, at all... But, its the decision that I have come to. And, whether you agree with it or not. I ask that you respect it, and pray for me as I take a step in a new direction, hopefully the right direction, and pray that, God takes me where He wants me to go, and that I will for once, shut up and follow.
So, what am I going to do? I really dont know. I am looking at a few things... A double major with Philosophy and English. I like to write, and have lots that I want to say. Philosophy would come in handy in Grad school, and English would help me get my ideas across. Foreign Language. I still have an inexplicable pull to Mexico, and, this would help out any possible mission venture to that area. Sociology. This could come in very handy as well as far as understanding people and finding ways to help them out, and helping them get what they need. I am not going to go to OC to do any of these because it doesn't make sense too. I'm sorry, but, in my opinion, thats not my thing. I want a "state" education. I don't want things sugar coated from a Christian angle. When I get into the real world (we already are, really), people aren't going to have that angle, and I want to already have some experience with it.
Anyways, thats a lot to read, so I guess I'll go ahead and end this. This is just a glimpse of whats going on. Talk to me sometime if you want more details, but, thats the main brunt of the issue. Like I said, I'm sorry if youre disappointed, but, this is how it is. I don't care if you think I'm being flaky, just, keep it to yourself. I'm here to stay for a while, get used to it, haha. Anyways, if you've gotten this far, you either have too much time on your hands, or you really cared about what I had to say. Either way, thanks.
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| Well, I guess, since it is that time of year... I will do the token New Years post...
2006. What can I say. It was kind of a blah year... I mean, there were some dang good times... The Austin trip, the Lubbock trip, the OC trip, the Mavs run for the title, new friends... There were some down times... Some sad times. It saw some of the highest points in my life, and, one of the lowest points of my life. All in all, final verdict, I survived, and am ready and glad that 2007 has arrived. I have a great feeling about 2007, and am welcoming it with open arms. Lets get it started.
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| Note: If you are reading this, then I am talking directly to you. I believe that whoever reads this, is guilty to some extent of what I am about to say. I myself am guilty of what you are about to read, and I believe that this is a huge problem that needs to be dealt with. Promptly.
I think we have a problem. And not just us. The ones reading, this. I think that Christians have a problem. I think that Americans have a problem. But, I am going to speak to you. We are growing complacent, apathetic. And this is leading into much deeper, more hurtful situations. I have thought it, and, I honestly think that the biggest thing that is wrong with us is, we have grown complacent, and apathetic. Think about it. Do we lie because we just, really like to lie? Or, is it that we don't really care about what that means? I think we are growing complacent in the sense of, everyone has their addiction. Sin, is an addiction. To some, their addiction is that, lying. For others, its sexual addiction. Then for others, its alcohol. The one thing that I notice about these, are, they are less hurtful to the group. Yes, lying can cause dissension. Sexual Addiction can cause you to hurt those around you. It can hurt your girlfriend, your best friend. Alcoholism hurts those that love you as well. But, I think, what truly can lead to the downfall of a church, isn't one of these.
Gossip according to Merriam-Webster, is a person who habitually reveals personal or sensational facts about others, or, the act of doing so, if you will.
If you want to take down a church, destroy a ministry, I believe that the fastest way to do so, is gossip.
By gossiping you accomplish 2 things. One, distort the views that people have towards a certain person, and then also turn people against yourself. Gossip can be as little as talking to a friend about how a roommate leaves dishes everywhere. It can be as small as telling someone that you suspect a mutual friend is cheating on their boyfriend/girlfriend. It can be mentioning in passing that you smelled alcohol on a friends breath, and it was strong, so they must have been drunk. It could be talking bad about coworkers.
I don't think that we intentionally gossip in an attempt to "get back" at someone or hurt their feelings. I think that we do it just because we cant think of anything else to talk about. But, if you're looking for something to talk about, and all that you can think of is to say something that is going on in the life of your roommate, who hasn't been telling anyone that it is going on, if it is something that you know is private? Do not talk about it. It is rude, inconsiderate, and wrong. Gossip is wrong. I cant throw stones at anyone though. I am guilty of doing it everyday, and its a struggle that I really want to crack down on. Another word for gossip, that I don't think many realize, is Vent. How many times have you relentlessly bashed a roommate or a friend for something they do or don't, or something they said, and then to justify it, you just say "I'm only venting." Venting is the same thing. I did it just last night. Me and a friend had a vent fest about 2 people that we know. In front of a 3rd party no less. So now, those 2 people have a tainted view of the person I was talking about, and me and the 3rd party have a tainted view of the person the other individual was talking about. I love the person I was talking about. I think that they are great, and I wouldn't know what to do without them. But what I did was wrong. By me letting the other person go on, was wrong. The 3rd party, by listening, and not saying something, was wrong. You want to destroy this ministry? Gossip. Vent. Because thats what you're going to do. You are going to turn people against one another, and yourself. This is a time when we need complete unity to survive. Divided, this ministry will fall...
Now, to you 3rd party people out there. While not taking an active role in the gossip, you are still wrong to let it go on I believe. When you are in a situation where you know that what is going on is wrong, when you don't stop it, you in effect become an active party. If you see it going on. Stop it.
You need to realize. This is a very very unstable and fragile time for this ministry. Gossip of any kind. No matter how small you think it is, is very detrimental to our success.
:: Steps off of soap box ::
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| It's amazing what can happen in a month. Let me tell you. I mean, really, quite amazing.
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| I GET TO SEE THE BANNER RAISED MONDAY NIGHT!!
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